It’s The Season
Why don’t we ever account for men in postpartum? Do we think that their lives don’t change? Do we just expect them to understand the unexplainable? Here’s a harsh reality that we pass over in society, men experience their own version of postpartum. They experience a little different though, they don’t go through 40 weeks of pregnancy and hours of pain and labor and anguishing struggles of breastfeeding; they practically go to bed one night and wake up with their whole world shaken and brand new. The shock for them I think is different than a moms, but just as impactful for their journey and how they can support you through your journey. How often do you sit and ask your partner how they are dealing with the complete family dynamic shift? I know I didn’t. I desperately wanted him to understand everything I was going through and not communicating what he was going through, not exactly sympathizing either. He saw me struggling with breastfeeding and was not only missing out on that bonding time but also couldn’t fix my problems. I want to make this very clear, postpartum is hard on everyone, and if you need and want your partner to be your rock, open the communication lines. Express what your needs are and ask what you can do for them. I’m not sitting here saying I know exactly what my partner went through in our two postpartum experiences, but I sympathize with it, and Vice versa. We are human and having a baby is a big change, no matter if it’s your first or tenth, it’s impactful. My belief is that we need to create more spaces where men can get better support for what they go through, we expect them to wake up a dad and go back to work and figure out the rest as they go along. Dads are huge part of your growing family and your kids lives, experience everything you can WITH them. Don’t shut them out and don’t let them shut you out. This is a season of your lives, a rough season and seasons change. Support each other and embrace for the next season, while relishing the beautiful moments of the current season. I send you hope and healing for you and your family’s season 💫